Things are going well

I started the ABC diet at around 162 ish...
I lost a pound after the first day and then this morning woke up at 158!!!! Hello 150's!! BALLERRRRRR
So I have lost 4 lbs in just two days!!!

Here's how my magical 3lb loss day went:

Yesterday I finished off my roll of sushi. I think someone had a few pieces, cuz there were only maybe 3 pieces left which I had at breakfast. I'll estimate it at 105 calories. Then I had some probiotic juice. Yummy! (120 calories) a Green tea latte (another 120 calories ) so that's 345 calories!!

To end my day, I also went out last night, I biked to the bar 10-15 minutes or so, had a couple of drinks, vodka and soda water ( approx. 140 calories total ) and went off with my date to his place for a little fun :)

As I was disrobing, he spun me around and said "you have a great body" WTF ??? I confessed that I was normally a bit thinner ( READ: A LOT Thinner, I was in the 120's last summer and had a crazy 6 pack, yummm ) and then he said "you look pretty thin to me" again WTF? I think he was just mesmerized by my D cups which he loved to grab, ah well. After some fun sexytimes I biked home. End of story.

Explanations for my 3 lb loss? Dehydration, alcohol is a super diuretic. Also, lots of sweaty activity i.e. biking and aerobics between the sheets, plus I managed to stay under 500 calories, YAHOO.


I might abandon the ABC diet, and just do under 500 calories for a while and then maybe alternate between 400 and 700 calories for the day to switch things up.

I'm not sure how long I can keep this up without freaking out my body and plateauing, but cigarettes help ENORMOUSLY with keeping my cal. intake so low.

Yikes

So while I haven't lost weight in the past couple of weeks, I've gotten fitter. My clothes fit better. Somehow I've stayed at 161 lbs, I hate that the number isn't budging.

I've decided to begin the ABC diet. I lost 9 lbs in 8 days the last time I did it. I think giving it another shot should be good. I have a weigh in next Wednesday at my doctor's. I would like to be in the 140's then. Combo-ing the ABC diet and some exercise should get me there since the last time I did it, I didn't exercise AT ALL!!

Today's intake:

GOAL 500 or less

cracker 30
PB2, 1.5 tbsps 75
coffee 5
watermelon 55
jelly beans(20) 82
beef jerky 25

total............ 272

That's a little over half my daily allotment, and it's only 2 pm!!!!

I will probably skip dinner, and maybe have a little more watermelon later on. Thank god for cigarettes... which will supplement this endeavor.

I've posted pictures to document the change. Sometimes I feel like my weight isn't indicative of my size. I'm not small. But I don't think I look like like I'm 161 and 5'3.5" still the pictures are upsetting. Fingers crossed I'm in the 50's tomorrow

Update: I had a small seaweed salad 90 cals ? and 3 pieces of an avocado/salmon roll 120 cal ?

Still pretty certain I was under 500 for the day. YAY!

Oh Dear

I started to reread anaregzig's blog and just the first few months of her posts were incredibly inspiring. There were two new posts from this year. I hope she continues to post, I would love to know what's happened since her disappearance.

I didn't lose any weight before graduation. During senior week I GAINED. I was back up to around the largest I've ever been. The added weight made me feel disgusting. What was supposed to be the happiest time of the year was instead fraught with anxiety and depression. The depression hasn't completely gone away, but a new hope has sprouted in the gloom.

I'm now back at home, at my mother's house. Luckily for me my mom is trying to lose weight and always has low-cal/diet foods, sic. shiritaki noodles, low fat yogurt and LOTS of tea!

I've been hovering around 160 lbs, ugh terrible I know. I think this weekend will be a good opportunity for a liquid fast, with the possibility of expanding it out into an entire week of liquid fasting. I have a new whole foods protein shake, that is pretty tasty and filling.

I also have a new member deal at a power yoga studio. I'm gonna go every day until it expires, which is July 12th. 90 minutes of power yoga at 160 lbs burns around 760 calories. Recommended calorie intake to maintain my weight at a light activity level is 1750 calories. Keeping my calories under 500 a day will give me a net of 2,010 calories which is a little over half a lb of fat a day.

I miss that fear of eating, and the high of feeling empty yet I'm also afraid of it returning again and bringing me back to a dark place. In order to get rid of this weight fast, I have to enter that disordered space, and when it gets overwhelming...well I'll deal with that when I get there.

I'm back

I've been reading blogs, trying to stay motivated, but after losing all the weight while I was abroad, and losing a little more over the summer, I rebounded and have gained it all back.

I need to enforce some discipline in my life, meaning: restricting and working out everyday. I graduate in six weeks, and I need to be 120-125 by then.

I have a lot to lose, but I've done it before. It just requires courage, discipline and probably a little bit of adderall abuse.

Tomorrow begins a 2 day liquid fast (+ yogurt-which is only semi-solid), followed by liquids and veggies, with maybe the occasional can of tuna.

:\

I suck. I haven't been sticking to plan. I eat after 7, but at the same time I don't want my metabolism to shut down post workout. The best way to keep burning calories and fat is to burn them at the gym and eat just enough to fuel yourself and those workouts.

So today I had:
some grapes, coffee with soy milk and splenda, tostitos (yummy) mushrooms and salsa with guac ( 100 calories pre portioned!! )

100 calorie klondike bar

before the gym I had a packet of tuna (70cals) an egg white omelette (2 egg whites 15 cals each) with 1/4 of an oz of cheese ( if that ) and salsa which is like nothing.

I had half a luna bar and then the other half right before practice

I did cardio for about 43 minutes then I had practice, which consisted of abs, a bit of movement and a little more movement for 2 hours (nothing really intense)

When I got home I had a cigarette, then 2 pickle spears and some low cal hot cocoa (75 calories total, maybe ? )

I'm laying in bed with a rumble in my tummy telling me I'm not full which means the metabolism is going and I'm on my way.

I've found that when I do things right, and don't binge at night, it's so much easier to stay on track the next day. My stomach is small and a yogurt or a cup of food is just enough to feel satiated. I also have said "hell no" to gluten and it really makes all the difference. Bad carbs make my life hell.

I will weigh in tomorrow morning. I don't expect it to be good. I'd be ok with 138, and hopefully 135 by saturday morning, then 132 Monday morning and into the 120's by the following weekend. The goal is around 123 for halloween, and there I'll stay maybe dropping to 120, to me my body is pretty much perfect there. 115 would be ideal but impossible to maintain.

As long as I don't binge and I keep working out, I should be ok...

My secret weapons are cigarettes ( only after a workout max 2 a night) diet coke (duh) grapes (full of fiber, natures candy and three calories per delicious orb) baby carrots (again fiber) no sugar added bread and butter pickles ( crunch, flavor, sweetness, perfect for drunk nights ) SF jello (duh) and last but not least, pumpkin !! (140 calories a can, with splenda and cinnamon, so filled, full of nutrients and tastes soo good!!!!!!! )

I'm a huge snacker so this is perfect for me. A little bit every couple of hours and I stay below 1000 calories, am fueled for workouts and able to focus on my classes ( which are really hard, hi I'm pre-med)

Pray I'm not above 138 tomorrow.

Day 1 of getting back to business

I weighed in this morning at a whopping 140 lbs!!!!!!!!!!! GAAAAAAAH. So that means some ground rules.

750 calories a day or less.
No more gluten.
Eat clean. (My tastebuds have gotten used to crap)
At least 45 minutes of cardio burning 600 calories or more!
Abs EVERYDAY
Pushups EVERYDAY
Lots of stretching

No alcohol may touch thine lips until you are under 136!

If any of these rules are broken, energy drink fast the next day.

The goal is 136 or bust by Monday morning.

I have measurements. But they're too depressing to post right now. I'll post when they change along with weight updates.

It's good to be back girls!